The Little Things

I wish I could tell you in a way you could understand just how incredible it feels to get home from work, sit on the kitchen bench and eat from the jar.

I wish I could tell you in a way you could understand the freedom that comes with being able to eat at any time.

I wish I could tell you in a way you could understand how amazing it feels to say a wholehearted yes to last minute dinner plans or spontaneous snacks while you’re out and about.

I wish I could tell you in a way you could understand how fun it is to be able to sleep in and eat breakfast at any time.

I wish I could tell you in a way you could understand the enjoyment of being able to truly choose what you want to eat simply because you want it.

I wish I could tell you in a way you could understand how liberating it is to trust your own body.

I wish I could tell you in a way you could understand so many things about living a recovered life.

I wish I could tell you that this list is just the tip of the iceberg.

I wish I could tell you these things in a way you could understand and that by my telling you it would be enough for you to be able to change.

But I know it’s not.

Developing an eating disorder is not a choice.

Living with an eating disorder is not a choice.

Recovering is not a choice.

Doing the things that lead to your recovery are a choice.

Please don’t let the fear of change that is natural and inherent within all of us, and which shows up in thoughts such as “it’s not that important”, “I don’t want those things that much anyway”, “it’s not a big deal” be the thing that stops you ever finding out what it could all be like…

The little things do matter.

Don’t stop until you know they do.

The little things?

The little moments?

They aren’t little.

 ~ Jon Kabat-Zinn.